Oxytocin
Definition
Oxytocin is a naturally occurring hormone that plays an important role in bonding, relaxation, trust, and the feeling of connection between people. It is also known as the “cuddle hormone.”
Explanation of oxytocin
Oxytocin is one of the most influential hormones in human interaction. It is released during physical touch, orgasms, prolonged eye contact, hugging, and all forms of emotional closeness. Oxytocin is particularly relevant within BDSM, because many elements of BDSM – such as bondage, surrender, intense contact, rhythm, breathing, and prolonged physical or emotional closeness – can strongly stimulate the production of this hormone.
For a submissive, oxytocin can evoke a feeling of deep calm, security, and trust during and after a session. It allows them to feel safe in their attachment to the Dominant and makes the experience more than just stimulation: it becomes an experience that touches on intimacy, emotional openness, and surrender. Dominants also produce oxytocin, especially when caring for, being close to, or guiding a sub through an intense experience. This hormone contributes to the warm, loving component of BDSM that is often underestimated.
Oxytocin also plays a role in aftercare. After an intense session, the hormone can help reduce tension, strengthen the bond, and restore emotional stability. It explains why many subs need closeness, touch, or reassurance after a session, and why a session can create a deep connection that is difficult to put into words.
Safety & points of attention
Because oxytocin enhances feelings of trust and connection, it can also make people more susceptible to emotional confusion or dependence. It is important that both Dominants and submissives are aware of this.
A sub may feel closer than they would expect in everyday life due to the hormonal response, which can lead to idealization or blurring of boundaries if not discussed openly.
In addition, it is good to know that oxytocin is not the same as dopamine or adrenaline, which provide reward and excitement, respectively. A session can therefore trigger different hormonal responses at the same time.
Good communication, clear agreements, and aftercare are necessary to guide this hormonal mix in a healthy way.
Related terms oxytocin
Adrenaline
Dopamine
Endorphin
Hormones
Supspace
More information
