Abrasion
Definition
Within BDSM, abrasion refers to the deliberate creation of a scratching, rough, or scraping sensation on the skin, usually as part of sadistic or sensory play. It can be both physically painful and sensually stimulating and is always performed within the boundaries of consent.
Explanation of Abrasion
Touch is rarely superficial. It is all about sensation, excitement, variety, and sometimes even deliberately seeking out discomfort or pain. One of the lesser-known but particularly intense forms of stimulation is abrasion: creating a rubbing or scraping sensation on the skin. Not by hitting or pinching, but by friction. Slowly, precisely, and with a sharp edge.
Abrasion can be induced in all kinds of ways. Think of using a piece of rough burlap, a discarded scouring pad, lace panties with hard edges, coarse leather, sisal rope, or even a nail brush. Anything with a slightly rough surface can suddenly turn into an instrument of pleasure or torment—depending on how you use it. For some, it is purely sensual, for others it is a form of physical surrender that tingles, rubs, and challenges.
Both feather-soft and abrasively hard
What makes abrasion exciting is the interplay between softness and roughness. One moment there is hardly any contact—the next moment you feel the rough material sliding over a delicate piece of skin. It stimulates nerve endings in a completely different way than hitting or slapping. It is slower. Less deep, but at the same time intense. You play, as it were, with the boundary between touch and damage. Without actually breaking the skin, you do create that threat. And that feeling, that expectation, is what makes it so exciting for many people.
In sadistic games, abrasion is often used as a build-up. A sub may be tied up, blindfolded, and feel a rough material being rubbed over the inside of their thighs. Or over their nipples, the soles of their feet, the skin between their shoulder blades. In places that are sensitive, vulnerable. It often leads to shivers, startle responses, or deep surrender.
It’s all about subtlety
It is important to realize that abrasion is not an end in itself. It is not a matter of “the redder the skin, the better.” It is precisely its subtle use that makes it powerful. An experienced Dominant knows when the skin is ‘full’, or when the sensory experience turns into irritation. Hygiene also plays a role: abrasive materials must be clean, the skin must not already be damaged, and when in doubt, it is better to choose an alternative stimulus.
For some, abrasion also evokes emotional reactions. The combination of tenderness, pain, surrender, and control can cause tears to suddenly flow. This makes it ideal for so-called ZZZ experiences—where sour, sweet, and salty come together in one game.
Related concepts abrasion
Sensory deprivation
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