JOI
Definition
JOI stands for Jerk Off Instruction, a term used in BDSM and erotic contexts to refer to the guidance or control of masturbation by a Dominant. The submissive receives explicit instructions on what, when, and how to touch themselves, often combined with verbal dominance, control, or teasing.
Explanation of JOI
JOI is a popular form of mental and verbal domination that occurs both online and in physical sessions. The Dominant gives detailed instructions: how the sub may touch his genitals, at what pace, whether he should take a break, and sometimes whether or not he is allowed to ejaculate. The emphasis is not only on physical stimulation, but especially on psychological surrender and the feeling of control.
Within a Femdom context, JOI often has a humiliating or challenging character. For example, the sub is addressed about obedience, desires, or frustrations, while the Mistress determines whether orgasm is allowed at all. This can lead to intense tension, frustration, or release—especially when combined with edging, orgasm control, or denial.
JOI can also be a playful, stimulating way to create a sense of distance: the sub performs the actions themselves, but remains mentally under the complete influence of the Dominant’s energy. It is therefore a form of play in which control, obedience, and self-control are central.
Safety & points of attention
Although JOI is basically mentally and physically safe, it can be very intense emotionally. Clear agreements about boundaries, pace, and any orgasm restrictions are essential.
When JOI takes place online (via video, audio, or chat), it is important to remain alert to digital privacy and mutual trust.
Never force or share images without explicit consent.
Prolonged orgasm control or denial can cause physical tension, especially in men. Therefore, ensure that the sub has sufficient recovery time and that the game does not lead to pain or swelling.
Aftercare remains important with this form of mental domination, especially to deal with any emotional release.
Related terms JOI
Edging
Forced orgasm
Masturbation
Milking
Orgasm
Tease and denial
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