Sublist

Definition
A sublist is a form filled out by the sub prior to an appointment with a Dominant. The list contains personal details, boundaries, no-gos, experience, preferences, medical information, and any fetishes. Sublists are mainly used within the commercial circuit, but are essential for any form of BDSM in order to play safely and responsibly.

Sublijst
© Mrs Moriah

Explanation of sublist

A sublist is not a formality but a foundation for every safe encounter. Basically, it is a document in which a sub clarifies where he stands: what he desires, what he absolutely does not want, what experience he has already gained, and what physical or mental factors require attention. Many professional Dominants work structurally with sublists because it enables them to quickly and carefully assess the sub in front of them.

This involves not only practical matters but also reading energy, expectations, and realism. A well-filled sub list reveals what is possible, creates a foundation, and prevents unspoken fears or desires from causing problems later on. For the sub, filling out a list provides space for self-reflection. It forces them to take an honest look at their own limits, triggers, and motivations.

For the Dominant, it serves as a blueprint for the session. It provides direction, prevents misunderstandings, and clarifies where extra attention, care, or preparation is needed. Especially in the commercial circuit, where you often don’t know each other yet, the sublist forms a first layer of trust.

Safety and points of attention

Filling out a sublist is in itself part of safety. It provides insight into medical issues such as heart rhythm disorders, diabetes, blood pressure problems, use of medication, or mental vulnerabilities such as PTSD or anxiety disorders. This information can be crucial when a session becomes intense or when certain techniques carry risks.

The list also clarifies what the no-gos are, where the gray areas are, and what explicit consent is or is not given for. This prevents boundary violations, miscommunication, and disappointment.

It is important that the sublist is discussed in advance. The Dominant must verify that the answers are correct, complete, and realistic.

In addition, it should be emphasized that a sublist is not a legal contract and never replaces active consent: the sub must be free to revoke anything at any time.

Finally, a sublist should be treated confidentially. It contains sensitive information that must remain protected and should not be shared with others.

Related terms sublist

Boundaries
Hard limit
No-go
Submissive

More information

Encyclopedia
Letter S